Only Two Letters Spell Sexy: PR

Guess who’s one of the NFL’s most handsome quarterbacks?

Not this guy:

Or this guy:

Or even this guy:

Nope, all of these losers pale in comparison to…

ME!!!!!

That’s right homos, nothing screams sexy like Mr. Philip Rivers. I’m damn hot, and now I got the back up to prove it. How many people out there can say that have a 99 percent symmetrical face? Probably only 1 percent. Does that make sense? Hell no, but does it matter? HELL NO. Because I’m one hot biatch, and that’s that.

I’m so hot, girls use a t-shirt cannon to throw their panties onto the field. I’m so hot, Matt Leinart is begging to do beer bongs with me. I’m so hot, Justin Timberlake writes songs about me.



Don’t you see the reference there? Obviously, when JT says he’s bringing sexy back, it means that he’s inviting good ole Philly Rivers to the party.

I mean, just look at these photos, what’s sexier than this:

I rest my case.

See you Monday night, assholes, because this quarterback is ready to rumble. Who are we playing? Oakland? Pssht, I’ll beat them while posing for a GQ photo shoot, yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh baby!

Meanwhile in Oakland.


Sexiest QB in the NFL? Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, control yourself Jeff!