After his ESPN interview with Peter Gammons, Alex Rodriguez decided to stop by a local cafe in New York City to reflect upon his little, naive mistake. There was a poetry slam going on, so A-Roid decided to juice up his caffeine intake before showcasing his worth to the poetry world.
Stupid is as stupid does.
I am stupid.
I am stupid for taking steroids.
I am stupid for getting caught juicing up my manhood.
I am stupid for following the footsteps of Barry Bonds, Roger Clemens, Jason Giambi, Mark McGwire, and all those other juicers.
I am stupid for admitting my young, stupid, naive mistake.
I am stupid for letting Peter Gammons drill me, although the make-up artist did a fantastic job in portraying my red, tearish eyes and blushed, apologetic cheeks.
I am stupid for making up lame excuses during the interview.
I am stupid for taking steroids when I was a Texas Ranger. Steroids or no steroids, the Rangers were, and still are, going nowhere.
I am stupid for hooking up with a stripper in front of the New York media.
I am stupid for leaving my hot wife for a one-night stand with the worn out Material Girl.
I am stupid for still believing in the New York Yankees. The Yankees are stupid for standing behind me.
Money doesn't win World Series championships. But steroids win MVP awards.
I am stupid. I make $28 million a year. Sue me.
4 comments:
Another tragic aspect of A-Rod becoming A-Roid is the fact that his steroid use didn't really help him, statistically, which is probably because baseball is almost totally about mental sharpness and physical coordination, not brute strength. It doesn't make sense that such good players would mess themselves up like that.
I totally agree. He might've gotten a few more homers in those years he said he did it, but all his other years were fantastic, unless he's not admitting to something else.
It's sad to hear such a high-caliber player like him go that low to prove himself when he didn't need to prove anything at all.
Mental sharpness and physical coordination makes sense, but now I'm wondering how many more players are doing steroids. I'm sure there are plenty still hiding in the closet.
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