A Gift Too Good To Be True

Thank you god. For a while, I had to say that I was beginning to run out of things to write about. I mean, as my readers know, the only thing I really love to cover is good old NFL football. Sure I enjoy college football and basketball, but mocking kids who go out and play their hearts out doesn’t bring me too much personal enjoyment. Okay it does, but I do feel like kind of a jerk after every scathing college sports article I write. I mean, these guys are my age, playing for my entertainment. They put their bodies on the line and work their asses out everyday. Most importantly though, I feel bad because they don’t get paid for it and technically I make more money than them.

No, the fun has always been ragging on professional athletes, grown men who, let’s face it, act like five year olds on the playground most of the time. The ridiculousness of professional sports can reach astronomical heights sometimes, and even surpass the ridiculousness of politics.

Well, maybe not so much, but still you have to admit that things in sports can get down right outrageous sometimes. When you live in a world where Terrell Owens, a monster athlete who could easily whoop my ass, crying like a grown man about “his quarterback”, then yeah, things get pretty silly.

However, as of late, things have been rather calm. Sure, the Cowboys continue to be a circus sideshow and Kyle Orton of all people is contending for a spot in the Pro Bowl, but out here in California, things are uneventful. The Raiders and Niners are outstandingly un-extraordinary and the Chargers are well, the Chargers.

And because of this, I’ve been rather stuck on what to write about. I’ve really been running out of material. I mean, I can only write so many Norv Turner, Alex Smith character mockings before they got stale, and trust me, even I think they’re growing a little old. Other than a few characters, who else is there to write about? JaMarcus Russell? Boring. Frank Gore? Really boring. LT? Oh, just shoot me now. Seriously, there’s no one out there to mock no one! But then God, you came through and gave me this to work with:



And all I have to say is, you rock.